Category Archives: True Crime Tuesday

True Crime Tuesday: Tyranny of Technology Edition

Play it Hard
Technology can bring us together, but, as reports, technology can also tear us apart:

The reason for the call was initially described as an assault. But the BCSO says subsequent investigation revealed that the twelve-year-old Boulder County girl, who isn’t being identified due to her age, had tried to kill her mother on two separate occasions[.]

The first try allegedly took place on March 2.

How does a twelve-year-old attempt murder? Well, if they can’t wait for a gun show to pass through town…

The mother began feeling ill after drinking a breakfast smoothie,

Afterward, she noticed the distinct smell of bleach, the BCSO maintains.

Of course, many mothers want to believe the best of their children.

At first, she thought the girl had cleaned the glass with bleach and failed to rinse all of it out.

– yet many children don’t care what you think, Moooooooom.

Later that same week, however, she learned differently, owing to attempt number two.

In that instance, the BCSO says the girl poured bleach into a water carafe her mom keeps in her bedroom.

Fortunately, the mom didn’t take a big swig of the stuff.

So what could possibly have been the source of such familial strife? What lofty reasons could the girl have for such Shakespearean-level treachery as attempted matricide?

After scenting bleach again, she confronted her daughter, who’s said to have told her that she had decided to kill her because she’d taken away the girl’s iPhone.

1948 Startling Comics by Alex Schomberg
Technology isn’t done with us however – in fact, technology never rests, as discovered by Triston Home, a man who worried he was sharing his ex-wife-but-still-you-know.

The Smoking Gun reports:

Clark invited Horne over on July 1 to spend the night because “he was going to take her to work” the following day, cops noted.

Now, given the situation, I can see how passions might rise. How emotions might grow heavy.

Especially when Home found Clark’s secret.

While in Clark’s bedroom, the duo quarreled. When Clark repaired to the bathroom, Horne barged in and “began accusing her of cheating on him. He told her that she was cheating on him with a sex toy,” according to the affidavit.

Perhaps she’s just the love of his life and he has some deeply held belie-

Clark told cops that she used to be married to Horne, but “later learned that Triston was already married to another person and that their marriage was null and void.”

Black Abyss

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True Crime Tuesday: Cost? No Man Can Say. Edition

Amazing Stories - Blitzkrieg in the Past - Dinosaurs & Nazis Pulp Cover

Everyone involved in today’s True Crime Tuesday was chasing something – but at what cost? All sought something, and some, like Jared Ehlers, (as the HuffPo reports,) simply even took it.

The U.S. attorney’s office in Utah announced Wednesday that a grand jury returned the indictment against 35-year-old Jared Ehlers of Moab. He is facing up to 20 years in prison on the most serious of four counts.

Twenty years is serious business – who or what do you love enough to risk twenty years in prison for?

Did you say dinosaurs? Jared did.

Authorities in southeast Utah say [a] three-toed ancient track was pried last month from the sandstone on the Hell’s Revenge Trail in the Sand Flats Recreation Area near Moab.


Utah Bureau of Land Management District paleontologist Rebecca Hunt-Foster says the dinosaur tracks are 190 million years old. She says they are one-of-a-kind tracks that don’t have a price.

Still no word on if any amber or mosquitoes were involved, nor if Mr. Ehlers lead police on a high speed raptor-back chase.
Doc Savage 1933 - Dinosaur Pulp Cover
Jules Bahler, however, needed money but wanted fame – as reports:

Investigators with the FBI have sworn out a complaint against Jules Bahler, charging him with single counts of bank robbery and using and carrying a firearm during and in relation to a crime of violence. The document alleges Bahler on the afternoon of Wednesday, March 5, entered the Chemical Bank branch at 1513 Columbus Ave. in Bay City, brandished a submachine gun and fled with about $7,000.

The complaint says Bahler committed two similar crimes in Pontiac, robbing a Genisys Credit Union of $4,300 on Feb. 26 and a Bank of America branch of $4,000 on March 4.

Another serious bit of business. How did they bust him? Well, I suppose I’ve already given you the hint that he wanted fame, so, did he leave some Riddler-esque clue? Did he call in a cryptic tip to the Chief of Police? Did he taunt the law with letters to the media?


On Thursday, March 6, investigators learned that Bahler’s Facebook page — where he identifies himself as “King Romeo” — contained images of him brandishing a submachine gun. Investigators believed Bahler’s face matched that of the robber captured by bank surveillance cameras, the complaint states.

The Facebook page indicates that on March 5, Bahler posted a caption with the photos that reads, “Bought my first house And chopper today … lifes great.”

Jules BahlerA surveillance photo of the suspected robber from the Bay City Chemical Bank branch on Columbus Avenue. Police say the man is Jules Bahler and have charged him in federal court.
The page features a photograph of a home in Pontiac, which the FBI and Oakland County Sheriff’s deputies began staking out on Friday, March 7.


Officers initiated a traffic stop and arrested Bahler. They found a submachine gun in a duffle bag in the car, the complaint states.

Bahler confessed to his involvement in all three robberies and gave authorities consent to search his new home[.]

Famouse Fantastic Mysteries Pulp Cover
Needs, however, can get rather complex. For example, as ABC news reports, the needs of Barbara Bienvenue and her boyfriend, Paul, might seem rather tricky – after all, they were expecting quints:

Marie-Pier Gagnon, a reporter for Le Canada Français, a local French-language newspaper that covers Saint-Jean-sur-Richelieu, Quebec, reported on Jan. 23 that the couple was expecting quadruplets. They would be named Alexander, Sebastian, Charles and Rosalie, and they would be born via Cesarean section on Feb. 22 at the CHU Sainte-Justine Hospital in Montreal. Photos of a colorful room with wall-to-wall cribs accompanied the article.

Gagnon wrote that the news spurred a movement on social networks to help the couple, and donations poured in.

So – let’s take a moment and talk about cost. For example, knowing this is a TCT, and knowing I’ve just introduced you to a set of quints, are you starting to wonder what cost this piece is going to take on your heart?

I can assure you that no babies were hurt in the making of this post.

No babies at all.

It was only when Barbara Bienvenue, 37, went to the hospital to deliver the babies this month that doctors pulled her boyfriend aside to tell him she wasn’t pregnant and never had been, according to CTV, a Canadian news station.

“I lost everything, it was my whole life,” her boyfriend Paul Servat told the Toronto Sun, adding that Bienvenue told him she was expecting twins, then triplets, then quadruplets, then quintuplets. He said her belly grew, and she experienced morning sickness and lactation.

How badly are you seeking something to believe an ever increasing count of children?

How badly do you need to be seeking something to fake lactation or trick your body into doing so?

Everybody's Combined with Romance - DANGER pulp cover

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True Crime Tuesday: Better Late Than Never Edition

Bunny Lake is Missing
If it’s Tuesday – even a little later than normal on Tuesday – it must be True Crime Tuesday.

Today I bring you two tales of feminine wiles and fury. To start off, I’d like to note that, as a group of people living a pro-blade lifestyle, figure skaters are a surprisingly gentle lot – well, most of the time, as Vice reports.

A figure skating feud is brewing in Sweden.

To my mind that means impending triple Lutzes, but “Christine”, a member of the Landskrona Figure Skating and Sport Club (LKSK) feels that a competing group, GF Sport Figure-Skating, is truly taking things to a new level.

Christine had a hand in organizing LKSK, specifically as an antidote to GF’s monopoly on [local] figure skating education. Over the past few months, however, what could have been a spirited competition between two organizations with differing principles quickly turned bitter.For instance, LKSK provided loaner equipment to youngsters, contravening a longstanding GF policy.

This still seems like Bring It On on Ice, until:

GF responded by allegedly stealing the loaner equipment from Christine’s car. She’s certain GF-ers were the culprits because they disregarded her laptop during their burglary.

Okay, stolen equipment, could be a coincidence, could be the act of a misguided youth, I’m sure LKSK responded with a biting but well choreographed ice dancing routine, right?

It was supposedly LKSK thugs who upped the ante next by sending a letter to the GF’s treasurer Pauline Kronvall in which they ordered her to leave the GF board, or her children would be murdered.

– and someone stepped forward to make peace and bring reason back to an after-school activity for children, RIGHT?

[…]and last Wednesday a pet bunny was ripped to shreds in a late night raid on an organizer’s house.

[Christine’s] pet rabbit was decapitated, disemboweled, and had all its paws severed and laid out in a gruesome, Manson Family-style tableau.

On second thought, we may want to re-think sending these kids out with knives strapped to their feet.
Classic Usagi Yojimbo #2
At least, as reports, Maria Montenez-Colon is a lover and not a fighter:

Police say the initial 911 call happened just after 6 p.m., when Maria Montenez-Colon complained that she wanted her Corvette back.

When the officer arrived at the Almar Drive home, he said Montenez-Colon was very drunk.

Of course, even drunken folks may have their corvette stolen – what they may not do, however, is fondle justice.

The 58-year-old immediately told the officer he was sexy and asked if he was married, according to the incident report.

While it’s not to my own taste, I understand that there’s a certain appeal to a uniform – so, how did Maria make her play to be held in the long arms of the law?

Montenez-Colon allegedly told the officer, “I haven’t been penetrated in years,” and “I am so horny.”

Whoa, whoa, whoa, Maria – subtlety is the secret to seduction. Try again.

The officer tried to steer the conversation back to the topic of the call, asking what he could do for her.

Montenez-Colon’s response was “You can [expletive] me,” according to the report.

In an incredible act of patience, the officer managed to get back to something that vaguely resembled a complaint, then he departed.

At least, until…

Less than an hour later, Montenez-Colon called 911 again, complaining the officer who was at her home “pissed her off.”

The original officer arrived, along with a second officer.

Having had time to think about it, however, I’m sure the second visit was considerably more appropriate.

Montenez-Colon reportedly complained about the original visit to the second officer, saying, “He was a perfect gentleman[…]”

– yes, good, good –

“[…]but when I asked him to [expletive] me, he turned me down so that made me angry.”

Bad, Maria! BAD!

When asked by the original officer if she remembered the conversation about misuse of 911, Montenez-Colon allegedly said, “I do, but how else am I going to get you to [expletive] me?”

Montenez-Colon was arrested for Misuse of 911 and booked into the Charlotte County Jail.

“When people continue to abuse the 911 system you gotta take a stand, you gotta take a position,” explained Lt. Joe King, Punta Gorda Police Dept.

Maria was pretty specific about just which position that should be, but it’s not something we should get into here.
Police Detective

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True Crime Tuesday: Bite Outta Crime Edition

Spicy Mystery Stories, June 1936 - angry cat and angry woman pulp cover - The Cat Tastes Blood
Given my terrible flu I thought it best to inoculate us all with a triple-shot of true crime.

First the bad news, then the good news, then the best news:

We begin in the familial home of Yevgeniy Bolshakov, 26, as reported on by the SF Gate.

Bolshakov lives in an apartment with his parents, and when he came home from an outing Saturday, he asked about the cat, which had recently undergone surgery.

There’s no mention of why the cat was in for surgery, but, given my foreknowledge of the conclusion of this article, I might suppose it was recuperating from broken ribs after Yevgeniy hugged it too tightly.

That’s as far as I’d be willing to guess though.

His parents told Bolshakov that the cat was recuperating and that he couldn’t see the pet, said District Attorney Steve Wagstaffe.

His parents seem to agree.

By the way, do you feel a bit like The Walking Dead is influencing contemporary criminal practices? It’s a subtle shift, but I really think it’s there.

Why do I ask?

Oh, nothing.

Without warning, Bolshakov punched his 64-year-old father repeatedly in the head, Wagstaffe said. Then he “viciously” bit his father on the arm, ripping out a chunk of flesh, the prosecutor said. Bolshakov also allegedly bit his father twice on the elbow and once on the chin.

When his mother tried to intervene, Bolshakov punched her in the head and bit her on the hand, Wagstaffe said.

Better Homes and Gardens, November 1926 - cats with flowers pulp cover
In better news, the Star Tribune reports a Rochester sporting goods store Hooked on Fishing, was recently broken into…

But the intruder appeared to have left in a hurry, without stealing anything — not tackle nor cash that had been left in “a very visible spot,” Sgt. Tom Claymon said.

My first assumption, of course, would be that a well armed proprietor made for a short attempt at robbery – but no, it wasn’t firearms that saved the day: It was a robot – a robot fish.

The novelty bass, which had been hung near the door and would start singing “Take Me to the River” whenever someone entered the shop, was found on the floor after the intruder knocked it down as part of breaking the door to get in, according to the Olmsted County Sheriff’s Office.


[The shop] showed evidence that a burglar [was] scared off by [the] motion-activated, singing bass, authorities said.

At least someone, somewhere, now feels their novelty Christmas purchase was justified.
Fantastic Adventures - Slaves of the Fish Men
Easily my favourite bit of true crime news this week, however, comes from the Sun Times.

Police said Bacon approached his victim Saturday in the 3000 block of North Long. He repeatedly demanded she give him the keys to her car, authorities said.

Any man named Andre Bacon should be leading a better life. A man named Andre Bacon should be running a hipster cooking blog or leading a Wednesday evening crime show I wouldn’t watch – whatever the case, he certainly shouldn’t be badly attempting to carjack people.

Now Bacon, 21, of 113th and Harvard in Chicago, is charged with attempted vehicular hijacking and theft. Cook County Judge Maria Kuriakos Ciesil ordered Bacon held Sunday in lieu of $75,000 bail.

Especially not people as badass as our unnamed victim.

When Andre Bacon repeatedly demanded [the] woman give him the keys […] she did so.


She handed them over, police said, then closed the garage door, ran away and called police.

Officers later met the victim, and she opened the garage door for them. Inside they allegedly found the car, with Bacon in the driver’s seat, and the keys in the ignition.

The Girl in the Death Seat - pulp cover

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True Crime Tuesday: Smoked Meat Edition

Hugh Joseph Howard - Arsonist Pulp Cover
If it’s Tuesday, it’s time for some true crime.

We start with the easier-to-swallow of today’s two stories: The tale of a felonious feline collector, as reported in Italy’s The Local

The [unnamed] 50-year-old posed as a cat-lover when visiting refuges, taking home at least fifteen cats over a period of several months, La Stampa reported.

Sounds like an kindly Italian Papa collecting pets for his children?

Though fifteen does seem a bit excessive.

Lorenzo Croce, the president of Aidaa, said the man would ask to adopt “black cats with specific characteristics. They had to be around three years old, and quite plump.”

Uh oh.

But suspicions were raised among staff at the shelters run by Aidaa, the Italian animal welfare association, when he came up with excuses to avoid routine checks on the care of adopted animals.

Initially believing he might be part of a satanist group, they carried out a surprise check…

The good news: He’s not a Satanist.

…and “caught him in the act” as he was about to kill a cat he intended to eat, La Stampa said.

The bad news: He’s got a very, uh, broad palette.

“He even admitted to killing black cats and eating them in the company of friends,” Croce added.

The man confessed to having eaten the other cats in his care, and was arrested for maltreatment. The man, who is married with two children, now risks a prison sentence of between three months and a year, or a fine of up to €15,000.

Uncanny Tales - Black cat & skull pulp cover
We move now from the exotic climes of Italy to the what-the-hell-is-in-the-water climes of Florida, as reported by The Tampa Bay Times:

TAMPA — A man who lives in an apartment that was the scene of a huge fire Sunday night was arrested early Monday morning on a felony arson charge.

Not a huge surprise, right? It is Florida after all.

When firefighters arrived, they found smoke billowing from apartment No. B201, on the second floor of one of the buildings, authorities said. Crews put out the fire in about 20 minutes.

An investigation revealed that the fire originated in two separate areas — a bedroom and the kitchen — inside the apartment, according to a police report. Fire investigators determined that flammable liquids were spread to start the blaze.

Fine, you’ve got me curious Tampa Bay: What exactly caused the issue in B201?

Haskins, who lives in the apartment where the fire started, later told detectives that he wanted to get back at the company that manages Mar Plaza, police said.

Loud neighbours? Ripped off on rent? Problem with the No Pet policy?

His reason: They had recently told him to stop masturbating in front of his open windows and front door, according to police. He was arrested on a charge of first-degree arson and held in the Orient Road Jail without bail.

Arson Gang Busters Movie Poster

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True Crime Tuesday: One Pure Moment Edition

Second Ending - Evan Hunter - Pulp Cover

Merry Festivus and happy New Year!

I got you a little something: It’s a True Crime Tuesday.

Not just any TCT, however – no, this edition only has one story, but it’s special. Andrew Frey makes it so.

The HuffPo says:

Andrew Frey, 37, apparently made a series of outbursts and then began masturbating in an Oregon restaurant, The Oregonian reports.

I wish we’d gotten more reporting on what Frey was upset about before he undertook, uh, drastic hands-on measures.

Was he claiming his salad was wilted and if someone didn’t fix it he would drop trou? Maybe he was just announcing his one man show, “The Mating Ritual of the Highland Gorilla”?

It took 15 officers to finally take him into custody and stop him pleasuring himself.

Fifteen people!? Do we have a new super villain on our hands? The Panicked Penis Puller? Dr. Wankenstein?

No, of course not. It was meth. It’s always meth.

Frey later reportedly told authorities that he took methamphetamine and couldn’t remember the obscene incident, according to the Marion County Sheriff’s office.

I sometimes feel like meth was specifically invented simply to give us a substance that would make the claims in 1930s murder-and-madness pot propaganda flicks true.

The Junk Pusher - Robert W Taylor - Pulp Cover

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True Crime Tuesday: Excuses, Excuses Edition

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A life of crime is rarely a glamorous undertaking. Just ask career criminal, and culinary critic, Andrew Palmer.

As the HuffPo reports:

The Baltimore man dubbed the “Dine and Dasher” by police is at it again, authorities and restaurant owners say.


Andrew Palmer, 46, notorious for racking up food and drink tabs at area restaurants […] was arrested early Monday after owners said he refused to pay a $50 bill at Viccino Jay’s Italian Gourmet on Charles Street.

Palmer is apparently a man with a demanding palate, as he’s got a long history of this sort of behaviour – but how does this hungry hooligan avoid being apprehended for his appetite?

Well, he doesn’t.

It’s not that prosecutors haven’t been able to win convictions against Palmer. It’s that the crime — in most cases, theft under $100 — doesn’t carry a large enough penalty to deter someone with a taste for good food and drink who’s willing to do jail time. And because it’s a nonviolent offense, those who are found guilty serve only a fraction of their sentences.

So, what does his technique look like?

In January, police say, he went large at Sullivan’s Steakhouse, ordering the chicken piccata with a lobster add-on, a 22-ounce ribeye steak, four Blue Moon beers, three Bacardis and, for good measure, a coffee. It led to his second arrest of the week.

“Palmer’s seizure occurred when he was confronted about his unpaid bill as he exited the restaurant,” Officer Michael McGrath wrote in a statement of probable cause.

This is definitely a case in which forewarned is forearmed. Just ask the paramedics.

The night before, he went limp at upscale barbecue restaurant Oliver Speck’s in Harbor East when it was time to settle up on a $90 tab, according to the owner and a patron.

“The paramedics showed up and said, ‘Looks like our guy’s back,'” said Oliver Speck’s chef Jesse Sandlin. “He would not wake up, and they were like, ‘Come on Andy, stop faking.'”

Tattle Tales November 1936

The only thing worse than a career criminal, of course, is an amateur one.

It all started with a (I assume drunken) Halloween brawl, as the Naperville Sun reports:

Krakowiak allegedly instigated the trouble by shoving a woman whose daughter then came to her aid, the report read in part. Krakowiak then allegedly shoved the younger woman into the southbound lanes of Washington Street, where she “landed on her back,” according to the report.

Nino, identified by police as being the younger woman’s boyfriend, came to her assistance, as did his friend, Lopez, the report declared. That triggered “a melee (that) erupted in the street,” the report stated.

Unfortunately the would-be saviour was – er – easily confused, and things only worsened all around:

An undisclosed number of police officers who were in or near the area at the time tried to stop the fighting.

Nino was observed “throwing punches,” the report indicated. Lopez, meanwhile, “was arrested after punching a police officer, (after) mistaking his uniform for a costume,” the report continued.

Given the night I can almost understand his error – but how did they clear up the case of mistaken identity?

Klepinowski allegedly “elbowed a police officer in the face during the melee, resulting in his getting arrested after being Tased to obtain his compliance,” the report declared.

Oh yeah, with a tazer.

Police Detective Cases April


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